Official Music Videos

Posted in Glory!, Music, The Blood | 18 Comments

God's Plan

Christians who get screwed over by God’s plan should rejoice, for they are part of God’s plan.  Let’s say, for example, a racist cuntknuckle walks into an historic black church and murders nine innocent people.  Hypothetically, of course.  The victimized church and other Christians should rejoice in the knowledge that it was all part of God’s plan.  They should celebrate and shout “Glory to God for murdering my sister and my dad!”  “Thank you, Lord, for bringing death, destruction and agony within Your plan!”  “Praise Jesus, this will be totally worth it when I die some day!”

If they were to cry and be upset, that would be denying the wisdom and glory of God’s wonderful plan.  God doesn’t like it when you deny His plan.  He might strike down upon you with great wrath and furious vengeance for questioning His wisdom.  So, just to be safe, don’t be upset when tragedy strikes.  That would just be disrespectful.

 

God's Plan

Posted in Glory!, God's Plan, The Blood | 22 Comments

Starving for Jesus

Goodly Christians are reaching out to starving Muslim refugees in towns like Ramadi Inn, or whatever it’s called. They’ve run away from Allah’s minions (AKA ISIS), and are now homeless in the desert. Their homelessness only compounds their already serious aroma problem.

Despite worshipping a deity who forbids the use of soap in the one part of the world that needs it the most, nice Christians are donating much needed Bible MP3’s to help out. Why audio-Bibles instead of instead of food, water, shelter or medicine? Because they can’t read. Praise Jesus!

BigWhiteMiracle

Posted in Charity | 10 Comments

Georgia to Allow Family Bible Beatings

Georgia will soon pass a law that allows a man to beat his wife and children exactly as the Bible commands.  Finally! State-endorsed beatings for Jesus!  Brothers, this is what we’ve been working so hard to accomplish…  putting the Bible back into American laws the way Ben Franklin and Thomas Jefferson intended.

Rep. Sam Teasley and Sen. Josh McKoon have worked tirelessly to make this law permitting domestic violence (AKA “Godly correction”) a reality.  These fine Republicans will stop at nothing to put God’s heavy fist of love into every home in Georgia (and eventually the USA).  Christians have been oppressed for too long by man-made laws.  It’s time to violently punish the women and children as instructed in Ephesians 5:22-24 and 1 Timothy 2:11-15 and Psalm 137:9 and Proverbs 22:15 and Exodus 21:17 and 1 Peter 2:13 and 1 Corinthians 14:34-36 and Oh, Hallelujah!  Oh, God, yes!  Glorious Jesus Christ Almighty!  Jesus is coming!  OH YES!  Yes!!  Yes.  yes.    …  um.  yeah.  wow.

Jesus came once already.  Imagine how much harder he’ll come the second time when he sees all the women and children subjugated exactly as He commanded it!  Praise God!

Corrected Wife

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

 

Posted in Glory!, Oppression, The Blood | 48 Comments

(Seven Signs) Satan Stole Christmas

Satan stole Christmas and these seven signs are proof!  Consider the following:

  1. December 25th is the date of the re-birth of the sun in Mithraism (the 2600 year old religion in which a virgin gave birth to the son of god who was crucified and resurrected to save the believers).
  2. St. Nicholas, Thor and Odin all sneak into homes to deliver gifts in exchange for proper worship.
  3. Odin would land on rooftops to deliver his gifts while riding an 8-legged horse named “Sleipneer” which sounded like a team of reindeer on the roof.
  4. A Christmas tree comes from the December Saturnalia festival in worship of the Roman God Saturn.
  5. Kissing beneath a mistletoe comes from Druid tradition (filthy, filthy Druids).
  6. Yule is a Scandinavian god of fertility, and is the source of Yule-tidings.
  7. Even innocent looking winter wreaths and holly decorations are a pagan/wiccan tradition.

This Christmas, just lock yourself in a closet and pray for it to all go away.  And for Christ’s sake, don’t sing any Christmas Carols or you may summon the spirits of the damned right into your own living room!

ChristmasStockings

Satan stole Christmas

 

 

 

Posted in Holidays | 46 Comments

Mom Kills Son for Christ

A nice Christian mother killed her 10 year old son for Jesus, ensuring his passage into the Kingdom of God.  It appears Mrs. Blansett waited until her son used foul language to commit young Caleb into the Lord’s arms with a butcher knife as he slept.  When Caleb used a bad word, Mrs. Blansett could be assured she was following the Bible’s direct instructions when she put her son to death (Leviticus 20:9), thereby ensuring entry into heaven for both of them.  Of course the boy was not a cripple, which made him a perfect candidate for the Kingdom of God (Leviticus 21:16-23).

Mom Kills Son For Christ

Mom Kills Son for Christ

In this horrific world where Muslims kill so many in accordance with their fictional “holy” text, it sure is refreshing when a nice Christian follows the Holy Bible and kills someone for the merciful Glory of God.  Unfortunately, this nice Christian mother faces possible jail time, because doing as God commands is a crime in the U.S. these days.  When will this country’s war on Christianity come to an end?

If you’re thinking of killing your kids for Christ, we wrote a nice little hymn about how to be a good parent called “Fuck the Children”.  It’s the first song on our album “The Hordes”, which we are giving away for free (for now).  Jesus loves metal, and so you must too (or face the consequences).  Download the entire album (for free, of course) at www.jesuschristindustries.org/killingforchrist/download

Praise Jesus!

 

Posted in Glory!, Put To Death, The Blood | 157 Comments

Porn Star Burns Church

China-lady pornography whore Asia Carrera ‘burned’ her local church by posing for an offensive photograph.  Ms. Carrera (possibly pronounced “cah-LEL-ah”) decided she would offend churches by taking her driver’s license photo with a spaghetti strainer on her head as religious head-wear.  Apparently, the religion known as Pastafarianism prescribes a noodle strainer as a religious hat.  What kind of insane religion would condone a ridiculous hat?

After hours of internet research into Ms. Carrera’s long history of producing offensive photographs, we have determined that Ms. Carrera is probably bound for hell.  Our research may take several more weeks just to be certain.  That reminds me…  Church Spaghetti night is this Wednesday.

AsiaCarrera

Posted in Sin | 12 Comments

Boy Persecuted for Following Faith

“Thou shalt suffer not a witch to live.” – Exodus 22:17    It’s a simple instruction.  As plain as it gets.  Yet, following that simple rule given directly by God Himself might result in jail time for any Christian who is caught.  That’s what happened to a young Christian boy named Isaiah Marin.  He expressed God’s love and followed God’s plan as commanded in the Christian Bible when he beheaded a local witch, but may now face jail time for his beliefs.  Why should good Christians be forced to live in fear in God’s chosen country and be persecuted for following faith?

Executing witches is a normal part of God’s plan for mankind as outlined in the Bible.  So many modern anti-Christians and wannabe-Christians pretend God is all about life for everyone, but the Bible says differently.  When this young boy beheaded his brother’s friend for being curious about Wicca, he followed his deeply held religious beliefs and the explicit written instructions of God.  For his crime of Christianity, he may now face jail time in direct violation of his God-given 1st amendment rights!  Thanks, Obama.

GentleChristianBoy

Innocent Christian jailed for following Bible.

#ChickFilA  #JesusSaves  #HobbyLobby

The most reviled tech thrash album of 2014 – Killing For Christ “The Hordes” – is now free to download at http://bit.ly/KillingForChrist

 

 

Posted in Oppression, Put To Death | 144 Comments

Praise Jesus and Pass the Lighter Fluid!

The American Family Association and Chick-fil-A are winning! Money donated by large US Christian entities to African countries like Uganda are going to good use promoting Christian Family values like legally executing gays in the streets. These nice Christians love the sinner but hate the sin as they force feed kerosene to the homos, beat them, sodomize them with sticks, glue their rectums shut, dowse them in gasoline and light them on fire in public streets so that all the children can see what happens when you are an abomination in the eyes of the Lord.

This demonstration of God’s love is prescribed by the Bible and is for their own good, according to the local church elders and law-makers. “The only way into heaven is through the BLOOD of Jesus, not through his anus”, says American Christian Family Association minister Umbuktu Olamide McTavish. “Love and family values are central to God’s tough-love approach in Africa”, which McTavish says is funded by large donations from American Christians. Praise Jesus and pass the lighter fluid! (void where prohibited)

#ChickFilA #FamilyValues

ChristianFamilyValues

The most reviled tech thrash album of 2014 – Killing For Christ “The Hordes” – is now free to download at http://bit.ly/KillingForChrist

Posted in Glory!, Put To Death | 48 Comments

Jesus has been Deleted!

According to historians, Jesus has been deleted from most or all of the old historical records of His time!  Who would work so hard to oppress Christians in this way?  The only ones with that kind of power today are Satan and Obama, and I’ve never personally seen them both in the same room!

Modern Christianity is based (in part) on Jesus existing.  We know he must have existed because Christianity exists, and there’s never been a religion based on a fictional character who never existed.  Right?  Plus hundreds of Christian historians who reference only each other in their studies can’t be wrong!  So who has deleted Jesus from all of the detailed records of His time?  Maybe it’s the same person who deleted Bethlehem and Nazareth from being actual places at the time Jesus would have born.  It doesn’t matter if there are no legitimate historical records of Jesus ever existing.  The only evidence a Christian needs is faith.  Praise Jesus!  #ChickFilA

The most reviled tech thrash album of 2014 – Killing For Christ “The Hordes” – is now free to download at http://bit.ly/KillingForChrist

404JesusNotFound

Posted in Oppression | 20 Comments

Child Rapist Only Faces 2 Years

A teenage rapist only faces 2 years in prison for raping a statue of Jesus.  The statue was on His knees praying to Himself when a 14 year old thought he would pretend to force his gay agenda down Jesus’ throat and take pictures.  While he never actually exposed himself, the boy clearly traumatized Jesus with his make-believe.

The Bible prescribes the death penalty for this behavior (Romans 1:24-32), but this child rapist only faces 2 years in Pennsylvania prison for this first offense.  Obviously, this child should never be allowed out of prison for this heinous act of faggotry against Our Lord.  If he’s willing to pretend mouth-rape Our Savior, who else is he willing to pretend mouth-rape?  It’s a slippery slope.  First Jesus, then perhaps babies and eventually turtles and sheep.  No one is above a pretend mouth-raping when this child predator is on the loose!

Why are the courts allowing children to commit hate-crimes like these against Jesus?  This is just one of the countless ways Christians are brutally oppressed in God’s own chosen country!  It’s time to nip this thing in the butt.  Tell the Pennsylvania courts to permanently lock this monster up and throw away the key!  At least we can rest easy knowing he’ll have to register as a sex offender for the rest of his life.  Praise Jesus!

#MouthRape #ChickFilA

The most reviled thrash album of 2014 – Killing For Christ “The Hordes” – is now free to download at http://bit.ly/KillingForChrist

 

TeenJesusRape

Posted in Oppression, Sin | 84 Comments